It’s been a while since I’ve written. As much as I’ve tried to avoid it I fell into the same pattern as most of everyone around me, consuming time as if there is plenty of it to waste, capturing moments in pixels rather than experiencing them, letting thoughts slip away, letting life flee. There were half written sentences in notepads and email drafts that I can’t finish because the time has passed and I can no longer recall what inspired to me to begin writing down those words. It’s only now, in the comfort of home, in the middle of the night, when even Facebook quiets down for a bit, that I can attempt to sew some thoughts together. To think about how the time has passed so quickly once again, what I’ve learned if anything at all, what I’ve gained and what I gave up in exchange. To think about life, not what I want to get out of it but just what it is, the mystery and beauty of it all. To think about myself, because we will never live life as anyone else but ourselves, yet we spend so much time looking at everyone else, in envy and in pity, as they do the same to us.
On my way to Pudong Airport I met a very happy taxi driver. He was 61, retired, and drives a taxi because “it makes him happy every day.” The drive to the airport was long, and I had the privilege of listening to the story of this man whose contentment exudes from his smile and his words. He was a native of Shanghai who was sent to work in the countryside in his younger days, and when he moved back to the city he worked for a factory that went bankrupt like many other state owned enterprises. After he lost his job he drove a taxi for many years, and loved it so much that he never wanted to quit. He is happily married and adores his wife, to whom he would never utter a harsh word because that’s how a marriage should be. His proudest achievement is raising a son whose values match his own, and has accomplished much more beyond he had ever imagined. He said, it’s better to be a good person than a bad person. He said, the biggest problem with China is that people stop teaching their kids the right values. He said, what you do doesn’t define who you are. He said, rushing doesn’t necessarily help you get to where you need to go faster. He said, don’t bother keeping up appearances for other people.
The taxi driver owns three apartments in Shanghai. His son is an executive of a MNC who worked his way up through vocational school, a college degree through night school, and finally a Ph.D in Germany. He owns his own taxi and stays home when he doesn’t feel like driving. That doesn’t happen often, because what he loves is to drive a taxi, meet people, and share his life and lessons.
In that moment I’m reminded of the kind of person I want to be. A few months ago someone asked me, “what do you want to be your legacy?” To be quite honest I have not thought much about my legacy. I prefer to live this life for myself and not worry about what remains of me after I die. But if I should leave anything, I would liked to have inspired someone. My sister, a long time friend, or a friend that I’ve perhaps lost touch with. A child I’ve tutored, a student I’ve spoken to, or a stranger in a taxi. I would like know that I’ve affected someone in a positive way, not through some grand fanfare, but simply by being myself, living a life standing by my principles, and sharing my stories. Not only those of triumph and excitement, but also those of defeat and sorrow. For I truly believe it’s the failures in life that build our character, and it’s how we face those failures that defines who we are.
La vita è bella.
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