The Missing Wallet

The summer after my sophomore year in college, I made my first trip back to the motherland. As I gleefully embarked on a shopping spree in the underground market, a thief stole my wallet, which inconveniently contained my green card. The one month that followed was agonizing as I navigated the channels to somehow get back into the good old US of A. Being a permanent resident instead of a citizen offers limited options, but I was finally able to procure a letter from the American embassy in Beijing to get on the plane, then go through an interview at the border with an immigrant officer who asked me “how can I be sure you didn’t sell your green card?”

The direct consequence of this unfortunate incident resulted in the following:

1. Since I missed 3 weeks of school, I was dropped from all of my business school classes. As a MIS major, I would not have been able to complete my degree on time as the classes were all sequential. I switched my major to finance instead so I can still graduate on time.
2. I became an American citizen so I don’t ever have to go through this again.
3. I am super distrustful of Chinese people and guard my purse with a suspicious eye whenever I’m out. No wallets have been stolen since.

It was 11PM when I discovered that my wallet wasn’t in my purse. I retraced my steps and realized the only place that I could have left it was the restaurant where I had dinner. The phone rang and rang and no one answered, and I went to sleep accepting the harsh reality that I would never ever see the lovely skulls on my fake Thomas Wylde again. I was so convinced that it would not be found that, the next day, I did not even make the effort to try and call the restaurant until after lunch. To my infinite surprise, the restaurant actually had my wallet! I was so amazed that I almost got hit by a car (since I was crossing the street illegally as I made this call).

The entire afternoon I was in a state of euphoria. All the hours I saved from not having to replace all my ATM cards. All the things I could buy with the money I had already mentally parted with. Crisis averted, and my faith in humanity restored.

After I calmed down a little bit, I thought about why I was so convinced that my wallet would not be found. In general, I believe myself to be a good person. In fact, just two weeks earlier, I found a wallet in a taxi and gave it to the taxi driver to return to its rightful owner (later I regretted it slightly because I couldn’t be sure that the taxi driver would actually try and return the wallet, but at least for my part, I thought I did the right thing). So why was I so convinced that someone else wouldn’t do the same for me?

As an expat returnee, when it comes to China, I have plenty of wonderful things to say, and also plenty of complaints. One of the biggest complaints I have is the materialistic nature that seems to have seeped through every vein of society, creating a generation of people who appear to only care about money and themselves. I know that description maybe biased and generalized, but I haven’t seem too many counter examples. I guess I’ve been given a great one now.

There’s a famous story regarding fortune by the a Chinese Daoist philosopher Huainanzi that goes something like this:

Among the people who lived close to the border, there was a man who led a righteous life. One day, his horse escaped without reason, and fled into barbarian territory. Everyone pitied him, but the old man said : “what makes you think this is not a good thing?”

Several months later, his horse returned, accompanied by a superb barbarian stallion. Everyone congratulated him. But the old man said: “what makes you think this is cannot be a bad thing?”

The family was richer from a good horse and his son enjoyed riding it, until one day he fell off the horse and broke his hip. Everyone pitied him, but the old man said: “what makes you think this is not a good thing!”

One year later, a large party of barbarians entered the border. All the valid men drew their bows and went to battle, and nine out of ten died. Since the old man’s son was lame, he and his father were both spared.

Sometimes you don’t know whether something that happens in your life is good or bad until much much later. Maybe there is actually no good or bad, it’s just life, it just happens.

The original Daoist story:

近塞上之人有善術者，馬無故亡而入胡，人皆弔之。其父曰：「此何遽不為福乎！」居數月，其馬將胡駿馬而歸，人皆賀之。其父曰：「此何遽不能為禍乎！」家富良馬，其子好騎，墮而折其髀，人皆弔之。其父曰：「此何遽不為福乎！」居一年，胡人大入塞，丁壯者引弦而戰，近塞之人，死者十九，此獨以跛之故，父子相保。故福之為禍，禍之為福，化不可極，深不可測也。